What does “stuck in grief” mean?
People are “stuck in grief” when many months or years after the bereavement, they’re still feeling the overwhelming pain and sadness of the loss. Very often people struggle to move forward with their own life at all. I’ve had a lot clients who lost a relative, often a child, and many years later were still stuck in that heart breaking loss.
Sometimes known as Complicated Grief or Prolonged Grief too. This is when the whole event remains feeling fresh and at the front of the mind. It’s re-experienced over and over again by reliving it. Hypnotherapy helps with stuck grief and enables people to move forward at their own pace, and find some peace of mind,
How long is ‘normal’ for grief?
There’s no set time because everyone experiences grief differently. Many factors affect it like how close you were to the person who passed, how they passed, whether it was expected etc.
Two years used to be regarded as a ‘normal’ grief period for major bereavements of someone close to you, but that’s not the agreed view anymore. But people know when it feels like they need help to overcome it.
How can I speed up the grief process?
This is a common question, but grief cannot be controlled. Grief is an emotional response to the loss of someone and involves a whole range of emotions and physical and cognitive effects. Experts used to say there were five stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance*. However it’s not always the case. Also the stages can be jumped between randomly, so it’s not a clear progress through to healing.
What helps with grief?
Everyone finds their own way of coping. Many people withdraw from others as much as possible. It may feel right but leads to more isolation and loneliness, which is often negative.
Some people find support groups and grief counselling. Others write out their feelings in a journal which they find helps to get clarity and allows them to vent their feelings safely.
Sometimes people find helpful charities like the Good Grief Trust and get support there. However some people try everything and still remain stuck…
How does hypnotherapy help with grief?
Hypnotherapy helps stuck grief in several ways. Some people use it to help change their final memory image of the person, and replace it with a healthier happier image, which hypnotherapy can help with.
Many people use hypnotherapy to gently and gradually move their focus back to their life and their future. They still carry their loss and sadness of course, but find a gentle way to start the journey back to the rest of their life. Solution focused Hypnotherapy is excellent for this because the pace is set by the person and it enables them to take control of their healing journey.
How many sessions of hypnotherapy are needed to heal from grief?
Everyone is different of course. Some of my clients who were suffering from bereavements 20 years ago only needed four or five sessions to enable them to start feeling better. It all depends on the person and their commitment and desire to heal. There is no set time and the client knows when they have got to the right place emotionally. The important thing is there is a way out. Even long term grief which has completely dominated the mind of the bereaved person can be helped to heal.
- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross wrote of the five stages of grief.